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Student Life > Life at Colgate > Residential Education Program > Wellness Institute > Keep It Sexy Colgate > Keeping It Real

Keeping It Real

The red zone

The first six weeks of the fall semester is called the RED ZONE for first-year students. During this time, students are most at risk of being sexually assaulted. Although everybody should take measures to stay safe at all times, the RED ZONE it the right time to start practicing healthy decision-making.

Tips

• Know your sexual desires. Know Your Limits. Communicate these desires. Clearly.
• Pay attention to what is happening around you.
• Do not assume that one form of sexual contact opens the door to any other sexual contact.
• Trust your intuition. If a situation feels unsafe, leave.
• Avoid extreme use of alcohol and other drugs. Substances impair your judgment.
• People who say "NO" are not rejecting you as a person.
• Do not assume that previous permission for sexual contact applies tot the current situation.
• Do not assume that a person who dresses in a “sexy” manner and flirts wants sexual contact.
• Adopt a "buddy system" – go with a friend, stay with a friend, leave with a friend.

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Drug and alcohol use

Any combination of alcohol, drugs, and sex can be dangerous. The use of alcohol or drugs can be a factor for the victim, the attacker, or both. Many sexual assaults are associated with substance use. While the use of alcohol is not the cause of rape or sexual abuse, it is often a major contributing factor. Drugs, including alcohol, impair judgment and may lead us to put ourselves in situations that we would not normally choose. Since intoxication may lead to misinterpretation of non-sexual behavior as sexual, the likelihood of rape or sexual abuse increases. Second, alcohol can diminish one’s ability to control aggressive urges. Intoxication makes it more difficult to think of non-aggressive solutions to satisfaction. On the contrary, forcing sexual contact on another person, whether the person is drunk or not, is sexual abuse. Everyone must learn that being drunk does not justify rape or sexual abuse.

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Heterosexism

Opposite-sex intimate relationships are often considered the “norm” rather than a type of intimate relationship. When this perception influences people, they make decisions about the world in discriminatory ways. Oftentimes, please don’t realize they are using heterosexist thinking when they view the world around them. Consider your own biases and how they may affect the ways that you treat others. Everybody can learn to be more inclusive. These links provide more information:

LGBTQQIA (Oregon State)
Homophobia and Heterosexism Resource (Berkeley)

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Emotional abuse and partner relationship violence

Relationships are entered for many reasons. Sometimes people find themselves in unhealthy relationships and don’t know what to do. Relationships can change over time and if you find yourself in a bad relationship, you may feel trapped. There is a lot of support available to you on and off campus. Please find help.

Counseling Center (Illinois Urbana-Champaign)
Emotional Abuse Quiz
Health Services (Minnesota Duluth)
Relationship violence in LGBTQ Communities (Mincava)

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Suggested texts for further reading (compiled by Jaclyn Berger, Class of 2009)

• Bogle, Kathleen A. 2008. Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus. New York: New York University Press.
• Friedman, J., & Valenti, J. 2008. Yes Means Yes. Berkeley, CA: Seal.
• Hattery, Angela. 2009. Intimate Partner Violence. Lanham: Rowman & Littlefield Publishers, Inc.
• Levy, Ariel. 2005. Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture. New York: Simon & Schuster, Inc.
• Robbins, Alexandra. 2004. Pledged: The Secret Life of Sororities. New York: Hyperion.
• Sessions Stepp, Laura. 2007. Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both. New York: Penguin.
• Sanday, Peggy. 2007. Fraternity Gang Rape: Sex, Brotherhood, and Privilege on Campus. New York: New York Press